Collision Coverage

Small thoughts on disaster-proofing life

Photo by Robin Battison on Unsplash

I’ve been thinking lately about collision coverage.

As you might guess, my family was in a (small) car accident a few days ago. We are all okay. The car, much to my surprise, was not.

Despite the fact that we were traveling quite slowly, in stop-and-go traffic, when the teen driving the big SUV in front of us initiated a lane change and then abruptly swerved back into our path and slammed on her brakes, the impact completely crushed the front end of our car. Police on the scene couldn’t figure out why our airbags hadn’t deployed, given how wiped out our hood and engine were. We couldn’t either, except that we had barely felt any impact. Speed wasn’t a factor. We were hardly jostled.

I can’t imagine what it was that caused the catastrophic damage to our vehicle, except maybe the angle and the size difference between the SUV and our modest sedan. But it really doesn’t matter, because sometimes life is like that — you’re going along at a cautious rate of speed, thinking everything is fine, thinking you’re playing it safe, and then out of nowhere something unexpected flies into your path and WHAM.

Catastrophic damage.

So there we stood, by the side of a highway in the dark, waiting for a police report, on the phone with our insurance agent when we should have been pulling into our driveway after a lovely evening out together. It was disorienting, and frustrating, and inconvenient, to say the least. We ended up getting dropped off two-by-two — my husband and younger son by the tow driver, my elder son and I by a helpful cop — at a gas station up the road, from which we had to call an Uber driver, who eventually arrived to take us the 20 minutes or so home. But since were no more than shocked and inconvenienced, it was (and remains) fine.

Oh, we don’t have our second car at the moment, which is mildly annoying. And yes, we’ll have to pay our deductible. And it’s looking increasingly likely that the outcome may be that we need to look for a new (to us) car. But none of that is as awful or even as expensive as it might have been, because we have excellent collision coverage, which is a very boring thing you never feel grateful for until you need it. And then you’re very, very grateful to have it.

On the morning after the accident, I woke up filled with that sense of gratitude. All four of us were alive and unharmed, our insurance company was helping sort out the damages, and we still had a weekend full of plans ahead of us, none of which were in any way impacted by our mishap. My husband, who had been driving at the time, felt less sunny than I did.

“I feel stupid,” he said. “I know she made a mistake and then I couldn’t avoid it, but I feel like it shouldn’t have happened.”

“I know,” I said, “but it could have happened to any of us. And besides, think of all we have to be grateful for. We encountered some very nice, helpful people last night, which is always something to appreciate. We’re all okay. Our insurance is good, so we’re able to handle whatever happens, financially. We’ve got a roof over our heads, food to eat, a dog to walk, and friends and family. Today is a good day regardless of what happened.”

And it was. And it is. That day, this day, all the days in between, all the days coming — I can’t say for sure every one of them will be good days (realistically, they can’t be), but as long as there are friends and family and dogs and a warm house and food on the table, we can at least look at each other over the wreckage of whatever the latest external catastrophe is and say “We’re okay.”

It got me thinking that what we all need, really, in this time of constant unexpected and shocking collisions all around us, this moment when forces bigger than ourselves continue to slam into us at unpredictable angles, causing outsized destruction…what we need is collision coverage. When we can’t possibly foresee or avoid every crash, we need to be able to brace for impact knowing that we’re going to survive them.

Easier said than done, undoubtedly. Some people are in far greater danger than others. Some people are far more able than their neighbors to feel assured they can survive whatever is coming. We’re not all starting from the same place, for sure. Some of us are driving the life equivalent of a luxury SUV that can withstand much more force and damage than someone else’s rusty hatchback. Some of us are left standing on the side of the road, trying to hitch a ride in a never-ending rainstorm.

But all of us can consider what we can do to add some collision coverage to our lives, or to the lives of others. How can we do our best to preserve the things that are most dear, most close and precious to us? Maybe there are practical steps to be taken; money to be saved or moved, home repairs to complete, medical appointments to schedule, decisions to resolve. Maybe there are skills to learn or teach to others — gardening, mending, cooking, repairing. Maybe there are actions that would lift your spirits and contribute to a greater good, like volunteering or making a donation or raising your voice or extending a helping hand to a neighbor.

Or maybe the best collision coverage you can add to your life right now is to crash-proof your relationships. How can you better love and lift up the people in your life, expand your circles, invite more people into your heart, and strengthen the networks that underpin whatever community looks like to you?

Because I’ve said it before, many times, but it continues to be true: No matter what is happening around us, we have to continue to live each day. And even when we’re stunned by an incomprehensible amount of damage that seems to have come out of nowhere, as long as we’re still standing, the next day can be a good one.

How good? A lot of that depends on your collision coverage.

And that’s a community prompt for you all. What kind of “collision coverage” can you add to your life right now? Drop me a comment or hit the submit button to share with the MO 25 community.